Life's appetite

A mother's love

Posted by Unknown , March 24, 2012 11:52 PM

4 hours since I last saw my mom at the airport, she's bound to leave Hong Kong again. She came over to visit me and my dad for a month and I've never felt so attached. People say that whenever we grow old we realize and see what's important to us, I don't understand i say.. Until now.

My mom and I usually argue a lot, especially during my high schools days. Grudges casts from those days, desperate attempts to get away from her, you know.. the usual rebellious side of a teenage girl. I was even so mad at her once that deep inside me,I swore not to be like her. And like all young minds, life teaches us to feel otherwise.Clearly I must say that she's no typical mom, not the conservative type nor the subtle emotional one. Whenever I made a mistake, she'll beat the hell outta me (not physically) but emotionally and psychologically. Till now I wonder how she does that, she tells me I'm wrong and gives me that guilt trip, besides being an ungrateful and inconsiderate daughter that I was back then, I had an excuse not to care because I was spoiled and young, and yet I did. Till now i would always be grateful for the tough love she gave me.

Here comes College/Uni, and like an Eagle mom does to her babies she helps them get out of their nests pushes them off a cliff and let them fly on their own. And that was exactly how my mom did it. It's not normal for Filipino moms to let go of their kid that easily, first there's the emotional clinginess, the everything-you-need-lunch-snack-dinner-"midnight snack" kind of smothering, then the investigator mom that sneaks around to check who's hanging around her son/daughter. And none, not even one of those have i seen my mom did. I know she wanted to, that if she was given a choice she would have me beside her at all the time, but her love was strong that she wanted the best for me. She trusted me enough to be independent and mature to make my own decisions and mistakes. Sure, I had my hard times, but because of the pressure to live up to her expectations, it actually helped me. She was the only person that never doubted me, she knew that whatever life throws me or wherever pit hole I'm in, I would surpass it no matter what.

Today, I look back at the times I was with her, how i took everything she did and everything she gave to me for granted. That whoever I am, whatever I have and whatever I will achieve.. I owe it all to her. No one sees how strong a woman she is, I've seen her stand up through triumphs and still put up a smile, never saw her turned a blind eye, sacrifice for the people she loves, and fight for what she believes in. She may not know this, but I look up to her now more than ever before.

Dear Mama,


Siguro nakokornihan ka sa sinusulat ko noh? Hayaan mo na ma, miss lang kita agad eh. Alam ko naman kasi  na ayaw mo ng mga kadramahan kaya di tayo naguusap ng ganto. Di bale, wala ka nang choice kundi basahin toh.Wag mo na rin pigilin umiyak.. its ok. Ma, thank you. Di ko man madalas sinasabi pero naaappreciate ko talaga lahat ng ginagawa mo para saken. Pasensya na rin kung matigas ulo ko minsan, mana nga ako sayo dba? Di man tayo nag sasabi ng I love you tulad ng iba, sigurado ako mas mas close pa tayo sa kanila. Ingatan mo lagi sarili mo jan, wag masyadong high blood. Sana malapit na uli pagbalik mo. Miss you ma! Luv u!


Ang nagdradrama mong anak,
Chel